Women always like to play poker.
It is more polite to call it "tease".
It hides the poker-like deceit effect.
Every relationship starts with a poker game of sorts.
Hardly ever so verbal.
I remember growing up,
studying carefully the Nottenet concept.
I was hysterically implanting "The Great Gift" concept in
my fragile hormonal brain,
over long periods of frustrated solitude.
Revenge against womankind was in the holster,
and will take years of planning,
not to mention confidence-building,
to execute the revengeful plan.
My first revenge came at the age of nineteen and change.
I remember dropping forcefully and rapidly from my first
encounter with Bahad 1, knowing that The Great Gift
and the one year long poker revenge plan will be
accomplished that weekend.
I had several offers before, which I refused to my future Boss,
unwilling to accept the fact that I am not a rational animal.
I was a bit too well trained by the two great philosophers of the time.
I insisted to myself that the first one must come with love,
not quite understanding that my subconsciousness is busy
protecting me from what seemed much more important at the time :
The loss of the poker game,
the loss of the successful revenge plan,
fear of rejection.
In the long run, consciousness won:
By the time I was forty one, I had already been accepted
to the special angel forces unit.
I had to sign off all planned anger as part of the screening
process.
We then went into training.
I think it took some three and a half years:
from age eleven to fourteen and a a half or so.
Maybe the training started when the torturer was three,
I am still not sure.
Training is still in progress,
revenge is gone since my twenties I believe,
and jitters of anger are still sifting sometimes through
the safety nets we learned so hard how to build
during training.
And so, my adolescence left me with a very peculiar skill
that will continue to evolve over time.
I am a good poker player, but only if the the stake
has the title pre-first written on it loud and clear.
In training, we erased as much as possible any desire
to play poker on anything that is dangerous.
It never occurred to me that I will actually be Invited
to just such a poker game.
I felt like a hustler, and my hormones went loose.
"You will drown in your own ocean" - I said
But this was during the game, so it was just a poker line.
In fact, it was true in every respect,
save the fact that I left the second part out:
"and I will be there to protect you".
You did hear me loud and clear, of course,
so the ocean was actually my creation.
Titpa....
Quod Erat Demonstrandum.
